being a public health

it's been 3 months na rin sice i practice public health nursing..

i'm very much honest that i'll never dreamed to be a public health nurse...
but i really learned to appreciate it, to value it..
i thought public health is very easy...but no!...it's really hard because our focus is not the patient its self but rather the whole community...
it's hard because i have to deal them because their came from different religions, provinces...they have their own believes...we have to deal with them without offending them

i'm enjoying my work now...
i'm enjoying community services...
i know that health education, prevention should start in the community...because some of them are indigent..
some of them don't value health...
most of them need to enlighten their mind about the important of health...

if people just see their situation...
i know sometimes we should blame them too kc libre na nga and yet they don't go to center for immunization, for check up...
they stood in their beleive na its ok lng...gagaling din yan...

they are really lack of knowledge about health...if how important health is

such a great pretender...

i'm trying to control everything that is happening today...specially my emotion...

i have to hide it!i have to shed it..
i have to pretend that everything was okey, that everything was going smoothly...

i just hate myself for being so foolish..
for being to kind...
for being to good to be true...
for being so stupid...

i just have this stupid feeling that we will be ok again STUPID!...

i just can't control my tears, when we have this short conversation thru SMS
i was really surprise...
i can't help but wipe my tears when he said sorry...(for no known reason i cried, nd i can't shed it!!i know someone saw me nasa parlor kc me dat tym)
i feel his sincerity when he said so...
i know he might thought that i'm ok now...that i pushed him away
but if he just know what my real feeling is...
if u just know how much i want to keep u...
nd i hope u know it...

my warm condolence for you...
i will always be here for you, no matter what

"(

VIVA ATENEO!..one big fight!

it is really a one big fight for ateneo blue eagle...

they won with flying colors...

i'm really a self confessed frustrated atenean...

i really wanted to study in ateneo...

nd sayang i dont had a chance to watch the game live in araneta today..

i had no idea that the game today is ateneo vs. la salle

so i just watch it in studio 23...

they won hehehe

I miss the UAAP fever, the huge crowd..

all out ang support ni chris tiu nd l.a tenorio sa former team nila..

same wid other former player of la salle like macky cardona..

but anyways..

rabeh is really a great player he deserve to be MVP...galing panalo ang mga moves nia

same with nonoy baclao nd erik salamat (which i read from jiggy cruz blog former pres. cory aquino like nonoy baclao)

nd of course jia reyes, nd long...the whole team of ateneo...

it is really a ONE BIG FIGHT..

salamat, paalam 'tay abad

it's been a year of battle...my lolo passed away last august 2..

he suffered from esophageal mass cancer (one of the leading disorder, that cause death)..

last december when he first diagnosed esophageal cancer in lady matiatrix in lipa batangas, the option in order him to survive is to undergone operation, but my lolo refused...

by late december and early january of this year the family decided to ask for second opinion in one of the known cancer home in tarlac in Farah Arsenio Care for Cancer Patient nd Nursing Home...until they decided to go back in batangas nd last august 2 he passed away, without us knowing...we are all their in batangas that time, but unfortunately no one witness his last breath, no one heard his last word...he passed away peacefully

it's been a year of battle...but now his gone, now his with our Almighty God side, his now our angel, our guardian...

we might called him in different way, some called him mamay, some called him tatay abad, some called him lolo nd my grandmother called him "pareng abad"...

my lolo passed away at age of 75, not that bad actually...but the fact that really hurt us is everytime we saw him in pain, we saw him suffered from dysphagia, the sudden weight loss...we dont want him to suffer from more pain...since he celebrated his 75th birthday i already accepted the fact that anytime he will gone thu it's really painful...but i don't want him to suffer to more pain...i can no longer look at him evrytime we visit him, his already bedridden, he can no longer eat...and it hurt us much when we saw his situation...

WHAT I REMEMBER TO MY LOLO?

i would always remember his last word to me: "salamat ah!"...
i was really touch when my lolo say thank you to me that was last june when i accompanied him in his weekly check-up, malakas pa sya dat time...

nd i remember when we are still a kid, takot kame sa kanya, kc madalas lasing cia noon, nd i remember umiiyak na ako noon kapag parating na sia, nd mahilig cia mglaro ng tong-its dati me mga classmate pa nga cia kapag nglalaro nd one time nakapagserve aq ng meryenda sa kanila...

but as days goes by, malaki pinagbago nia, naging mabiro na sia sa amin mga apo nia, makulit pa nga cia...napaka bait nia...

i might never got a chance to say thank you to him, but you know, wherever are you now, "i wat to say thank u, for being our lolo, now that you're gone i promise you that we will take care your beloved widow, our lola so much, thank you for all the memories, learnings nd knowledge u impart to us, you will always be here in my heart mamay...nd mahal na mahal ka nmin..."

we know that you are happy now, now that you reunited to your father...

mahal na mahal ka nmin...

thnx..

just wanna tnx all people who are part of me..who guided me, who supported me, who molded me nd who inspired me for the past 22 years of life..

words are not enough to say thank you, wherever i'am now is all because of all of you...

to all my classmates, batchmates, friends, mentors, clinical instructors, professors, teachers since kindergarten and of course my families from both parties the garcia's and recuerdo's...thank you so much...thank you for inspiring me, thank you for rising me well:-)

now that i'm entering my new chapter of my life i hope all of you guys will continue to support and guide me as what you did in my past 22 years of life...

nd ofcourse to my heavenly father who is my bestfriend, the one who knows everything that i went tru...thank you so much

love you all nd godbless

i'm back after a month of soul searching...

...huh! i'm back for good after almost 3 weeks of vacation in my hometown...
for good kc officially today start na ako sa work ko as a Nurse in Paranaque Health Dept..

medyo ok na ako compard before, i still hope nd pray na sana someday actually by tomorrow makarecieve aq ng txt coming from him...i'm dying i really miss him...his presence...everything...

ang dami ngyari actually i will share it this coming weekend.. kapagod kc ang first day ko as a health advocator...taga thermometer check as a preventive measure to avoid the transmission of AH1N1 virus...

goodluck to me...

nd my birthday is coming hehehehe

godbless me nd all of us..

mwah

i just really miss the old times...

it's been a year na rin since i/we graduated. College days is full of hindrance and struggles. It made me to be a better person, it molded me to be who i'am now. My journey to college days is really a roller coaster ride. Before, i thought if u'r a college student u'r matured enough to face every struggles in life, but it depends upon to one person. I took up nursing for unknown reason (just to be honest!), way back high school days i really wanted to be a pharmacist (hahaha but know i realized ang harap ng pharmacology subj q before!) and to be a journalist..but anyways i took up nursing just out of the blue but i dont have any regrets that i took it up because i learn alot from it theoretically and scientifically speaking.

i appreciate nursing since ng start na ang clinical exposures i love it!i certainly love it!, got a chance to handle different cases, exposed in different environment, got a chance to touch lives, 50/50 survival rate of a patient, it is our/my honor to be handled by our/my clinical instructors who are very much willing to share there knowledge, teach us well and to be our inspiration to reach our dream and of course the most important is to bond with my groupmates, who are my partners in crime in doing the undying case presentation and documentation. I really should say that I had a great time with them. I (together with rho, noli and te ela) originally from group 2, but due to some reason nalipat kameng apat sa group 3, at first me hinayang factor kc why?it's been a year na din nmn silang goupmates but all of the sudden malilipat kame ng group and syempre I got a feeling na di nila kame tanggap kc me napahiwalay din silang groupmates because nalipat kame sa kanila nd other factor din siguro dat tym is we are not yet closed that time hehehehe, but life goes on we should start again it is another chapter of our life. as days goes by , we got a chance to know each other well until the time came na maging close and comfortable na kame sa isat-isa. As a evidence, to proof our closeness my friend and groupmate jomz compiled all the pics during duty days and fun momments that our group shared and she created a video as her grad gift, a memorabilia...a very brilliant idea.

i love watching it, i really missed the old times, and the first time i watch it i got a teary eyed because i'm really touch and surprised that jomz created it. we went tru a lot...all the memories that we shared will always be in my heart.

where ever we are know, whatever path we crossed, we might not connected to each other now but i'm pretty much sure that all the memories that the group shared contribute to who we are know...and i know like i do all of you guys kept the memories in your heart...

i just want you to know guys, that I, MEL IS ALWAYS HERE FOR ALL OF YOU GUYS, THAT I'M PRAYING FOR THE SUCCESS OF EACH OF US, WHAT EVER PATH YOU CROSSED,MY SUPPORT IS ON YOU, IF EVER ALL OF YOU GUYS NEED A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON, I'M JUST HERE...GUYS, I'M MISSED ALL OF YOU, I'M REALLY REALLY MISS YOU GUYS...I LOVE YOU GUYS AND GODBLESS...I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO SEE AND BOND WITH YOU GUYS"...i love you guys

no one knows...

i don't know what happen between the two of us...
i don't want this things to happen...i don't even know that this things will happen..
i never thought...never in my entire life

i have to shed all my tears, so no one will know that i'm crying so loud
that i'm so helpless
i have to smile, laugh so loud, so that people will thought i'm certainly ok!
so no one will ask me if why? nd what?

no one knows what my real feelings is?...
no one knows if how painful it is?...
no one can see it...

you don't know how painful it is...
you don't understand me...

god knows how much i love you...
i love you more than you ever know...

why do people cheat

i originally post this blog at my multiply account, i just post it here for some reason..

i read this article at yahoo web...

really interesting! so i decided to copy it...hehehe not because he cheated me but most people, experience it and most are curious if why people specially guy cheat. Are they born really as a cheaters or just an influence of the environment...(but i dont think so!that it is because of influence!...old enough for that excuses!!)what a hell...

for my opinion if you really love him/her you dont have to cheat, you should respect him/her!
so here it is...
happy reading...
Here are some situations that make people cheat:

1. BoredI'd say this is the most common reason that people cheat.It's tough to keep that edge throughout a relationship. Things start off grand and then level off and then you both realize that it's still real life. When you meet someone else, that inaugural excitement of a new relationship kicks back in.

2. DependenceAt first glance, cheating seems like independent behavior. It could be interpreted as doing what you want, when you want. But I would argue that cheating is a dependent behavior. A cheater is dependent because they are not strong enough to break up with their significant other in order to get with the new person.

3. ConfusionSometimes life or a particular situation can get to you. When the perfect storm of confusion is going on in your head, you make mistakes.

4. Because They Let YouIf any girl ever cheated on me, I'd break up with her immediately. Forgiving a cheater is putting up with it, and starts a vicious cycle. That person who cheated may lose respect for you and might continue to cheat-because they know they can get away with it, because you'll continue to take them back.

5. NurturingIf someone is mistreating you, then your first instinct is to get away from him or her. But sometimes it's not that simple-maybe you are raising kids together. If you feel trapped in a bad relationship, it's only natural that you will run to the open arms of a person who treats you well.

6. RevengeThis is quite simple- an eye for an eye. Cheat on them if they cheat on you. If they continuously hurt you or abuse you in some way, you do it to get them back.

7. Confirmation of AttractivenessSometimes when you're in a long relationship, or if your significant other is taking you for granted, you begin to wonder if you're still attractive. Perhaps, because you were out on the dating circuit, you felt more attractive when you were single. If you have an affair, you've proven that a new person can be attracted to you.

8. The ThrillSome people just enjoy the thrill of cheating: running around secretly, risking getting caught, andcreating thrilling moments with a forbidden romance.

9. They Don't Consider It Cheating, Even Though You MightRelationships have that grey area, usually right before you become exclusive. He thinks date #4 is when you're "together," and you think date #2 is when you're "together." If you haven't talked about exclusivity, someone may think they are well within their rights to see other people, even though the other person in the relationship may not.

I don't understand why people don't break up as soon as they have an urge to cheat. Is it natural to have temptation, or is temptation a sign that the relationship is losing its fire? What reasons would you add to this list, and do you disagree with any? If you've ever cheated, why did you do it? Could you forgive a cheater? If you are single, but seeing a person who is in a committed relationship, does that make you a cheater?
....

**wink**

if i were a boy

If I were a boy

Even just for a dayI'd roll outta bed in the morning

And throw on what I wanted then go

Drink beer with the guys

And chase after girlsI'd kick it with who I wanted

And I'd never get confronted for it.

Cause they'd stick up for me.

[Chorus:]

If I were a boyI think I could understand

How it feels to love a girl

I swear I'd be a better man.

I'd listen to her

Cause I know how it hurts

When you lose the one you wanted

Cause he's taken you for granted

And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy

I would turn off my phone

Tell everyone it's broken

So they'd think that I was sleepin' alone

I'd put myself first

And make the rules as I go

Cause I know that she'd be faithful

Waitin' for me to come home (to come home)

[Chorus]

It's a little too late for you to come back

Say it's just a mistake

Think I'd forgive you like that

If you thought I would wait for you

You thought wrong

[Chorus]

But you're just a boy

You don't understand

Yeah you don't understand

How it feels to love a girl someday

You wish you were a better man

You don't listen to her

You don't care how it hurts

Until you lose the one you wanted

Cause you've taken her for granted

And everything you have got destroyed

But you're just a boy

when everything turns to blue....

i dont know where to start...

this past few days was really stressful
i went tru alot (as in alotsss) of struggles
i dont even know if i act normal, i behave so rude, i'm so selfish
i should say that my life is a mess...

i thought i can, i thought i'm matured enough to face all the barriers in life...but i'm wrong...i'm certainly wrong!!...
i act so stupid!!
i'm so selfish in a way that i want things to happen according to my plan for me not to hurt
i was a great adviser but the problem is i can't even solve my own problem
i know what is the right and wrong
though i want to do the right one but it hurts me so much
i step down my ego just to satisfy my id
i was a god damn stupid to act like this
i know i'm wrong but what i'm going to do?...

i was really in pain
i went tru the DABDA process but i'm still in denial, the anger was there, i'm still in acceptance stage, depression was also still there! but i'm looking forward for acceptance i know it will takes time, i dont even know if when?...
all i know is i'm really hurting

i'm still wishing na sana ndi nangyari to....

and i'm looking forward na sana maging ok p lhat...

*****i want a shoulder to lean on******

Pacquiao;bring home the ham and bacon once again!

"Hard work and believe in God. yun talaga, I'm guide by the Holy Spirit" as said by Manny Pacquiao

may 2, a most awaited date for all filipinos and for all of the british.
i'm a self confessed a not pacquiao fan, but he truly give pride to our country
is'nt it?

did he ever lost in a game??...

at first feeling ko matatalo cia...hahahaha kc nman he face a lots of issues
nd for the first time isinama nia c mother dear nia sa las vegas which we are used of it that his mom stay in their hometown holding a rosary, praying hard for the victory of her dear son...

ROUND II???...a shocking revelation right?

i heard the news that our people champ won at around 12 noon, a breaking news in abs-cbn
i was really shock when i found out that knock out sa round two??...
i'm really proud as a filipino my god another achievements for him
he bring home the ham and bacon once again...

ano kaya secret nia noh?... i heard that mais daw kinakain nia, is it true??...
i dont know too..

but anyways, na challenge aq manood ng game, na curious aq if bakit round two pa lng knock out na...and of course out of curiosity lng if why hatton was rushed in the hospital...
ok, d ko masyado feel ang pagkakanta ni martin nievera, the voice was ok but the outfit is not!
for me he supposedly wear barong, kc i'm really sanay na thoose who sing a national anthem wear filipiniana, why he wear an amerikana with black shirt inside nd maong pants..if im not mistaken..
naawa aq kay hatton nung tinamaan cia sa jaw part nia nd when he started to fall and nging unconcious cia...

i'm pretty much sure na all of us are really happy for the outcome of the fight
because pacquiao won...
but is'nt it lugi for those who watch in malls kc two rounds lang?..
ndi ba mas thrill kung hanggang 10th round...hahaha

but what important is, pacquiao won
nd pansamantala na nman naisantabi (tama ba?) ang political and economical issues ng ating bansa...

congrats to him nd i'm just hoping na sana ndi lang boxing ang bigyan pansin natin esp. the media and our government, we should also give credits to other sports like basketball, chess, billiards, swimming and other sports because i'm pretty much sure na they also give pride to our country

but not only to sports but also to other fields...

ano kaya reaction ni mother dionisia?...for sure super happy...

again and again congrats to him...
nd u may continue to give honor to our country...
another achievement for you...

godbless..

"you know i only drink water, but there is something better, you know?"...

***mel***

proud to be batanguena

this is juday and ryan wedding at san juan nepomuceno church at san juan batangas...hehehehe

just kidding!pero sa san juan nepomuceno yan...
ganda ng church noh??...

proud q kc dun aq bininyagan at knumpilan...hehehe

true blue batanguena!hahahaha

****wink****

25 Random List About my self

25 RANDOM LIST ABOUT ME...

1. i'm a private person!

2. i always percieve other perception.

3. i'm "KURIPOT"

4. i love flip flops nd chuck taylor (anything flat goes)...i hate stiletto!

5. i dont drink any kind of soft drinks since birth for vague reason

6. i dont eat hotdog kapag ulam sa kanin but i eat jollyhotdog of jollibee...i dont eat cook tomato but i eatfresh tomato(so weird!)

7. i really wanted to study in ateneo de manila..

8. i love nursing because i learn alot theoretically nd scientifically but if given a chance to study again i would take up CARE FOR THE SPECIAL CHILD SPC. AUTISM (inspired by Donna Williams)

9. i hate beach...but i love pool but i dont know how to swim...hehehe

10. i love listening to d music pero wala ko memorize n kanta...hehehehe

11. i'm certified pizza lovers...(wow!complete meal!)

12. i'm not a coffee lover because of the laxative effect

13. i hate riding to d bus because i feel dizzi nd nasusuka ako sa amoy.

14. i love to read..

15. i'm introvert, homebody not fan of night life

16. i'm not really a fanatics but i really like bianca gonzales nd chris tiu because of their positive outlooks in life but ayoko mghost c chris...

17. i'm a nature lover i love color green, white nd blue...

18. i'm a rice person!...i can't live without rice!...

19. i really wanted to be a health advocator

20. i'm st. jude devotee

21. my wildest dream is to visit all the historical churches in the world nd same time to travel.

22. i never lost hope because of my faith

23. if i like one shirt i always wear it.

24. i love surfing the net

25. like a typical cancer girl...when i do something i'll make sure that i do it in the best than i can, i'm really reponsible nd perseverance..